She Was a Dark and Stormy Spitfire

Nothing like somebody else's bad writing to put a superior smirk on those of us who would like to think we're above it. A San Jose State U contest rewards those who prove they're capable of the worst writing. The winner wrote about carburetors and breasts, things his skilled fingers know quite well to hear him tell it with his top notch bad writing. I would probably come up with something like this...

-The 50's greaser caught her eye at the stop sign and popped the clutch, provoking an orgasmic squeal of hot rubber that went right through her. He was sure that his pair of deuces under the hood would put her pair of knockers in the back seat before the night was over. - See? That's some bad writing, and yet probably not good enough bad writing to win a prize, which would make me a mediocre bad writer.

To paraphrase our friend, Mickey on Sir Prize, you can just about get away with bad writing if you've learned how to be comfortable with yourself. And, of course, if not too many people read it.