No Tulips for Oil!

Dutch Environmental Sensitivity

US President George Bush's secret plan to destroy Holland has been revealed. The wicked Bush administration has struck the socially compassionate Dutch right where it hurts. The real reason behind Bush's refusal to sign the Kyoto Protocols has been revealed: Bush and his Don Quixote like cronies want to stop the windmills.

Windmills, long the symbol of man's victory over nature's cruel whims, these symbols of non-reliance on fossil fuels have been idled by a lack of wind. At first it was believed that Bush's sinister weather machines had used up much of the world's wind to create hurricane Katrina for his heartless assault on negroes in New Orleans. But clever Dutch scientists have calculated that the Dutch windmills will soon stop whirling as a direct result of global warming.

"It's too late now", says Rob Van Dorland, Dutch scientist and one-worlder. It is widely believed that the Dutch, who face Katrina-like flooding if the windmills fail completely, will have to resort to diesel engines to spin the water pumping windmills. If not, the Tulip industry will be ruined by the invading sea water. This would be a great victory for the Bush oilmen. It is feared Bush's next target will be the windmills in our own back yards.