Nebraska State Fair - You can't go home again.

What is Kachunga doing with his hand?

The State Fair is the best place to go to see examples of your neighbors. Sure, you won't want to admit that the odd-balls you find there represent the norm in your state. It seems too horrible to be true; you are identified with these fairgoers. It is worth the admission just to see who you are.

The Nebraska State Fair got started this weekend and will run through September third. The biggest headlines our fair has generated this year have to do with alligators and racism. Thats right, alligators and Nebraska's angriest Negro have cast an ugly pall over this year's Fair.

State Senator for Life Ernie Chambers has questioned the State Fair Board's decision to continue with a professional alligator wrestling demonstration at this year's Fair. He is concerned that alligator wrestling violates the reptiles' fundamental animal rights. As if that weren't bad enough, the "clean-cut" performers that put on the show are indelicately billed on the State Fair website as:

Kachunga, a real American Bushman who dares to step foot into the wet domain of the alligator, comes from deep in the swamps of Florida. He apprehends a ferocious man-eating reptile with his bare hands.

Ernie is convinced that calling these Florida white boys "Bushmen" is somehow racist. What a stretch. Here are some quotes from the OWH:

Chambers said he objected to putting the alligators "under stress for no reason other than cheap entertainment." He also said the Kachunga show's Web site reference to a gator handler as "a real American bushman" was racist.

Ernie goes on to threaten the Fair Board for failing to cancel the alligator torture show:

"The fair needs all the help they can get. They certainly don't need to create opponents, and they've created considerable opposition on my part," Chambers said. He noted that the Legislature will have a say on the possible moving of the fairgrounds to make way for expansion of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.

The real concern here, if indeed the Nebraska State Fair can generate any real concern, is this: that the animal rights and PETA types will come out of the woodwork like roaches to call for banning every showing of live animals at the fair. Certainly forcing these poor beasts to perform at the Fair stresses them. This uncalled for animal stressing must stop. No more 4H calves, no Clydesdales, no swine pavilion, no poultry, with no animals the Fair will become a Vegan event. The Nebraska State Fair is in still in real trouble.

These angry protesters will eventually demand we take the dog out of the corn dog.
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Update: Police investigators from the Nebraska State Patrol have raided the State Fair, ostensibly looking for bad carnies and rigged midway games. According to Omaha's Action 3 News, the police have said the rubber duck grab was the prime target of their raid. Grabbing ducks, even if they are rubber ones, sends a message to the the kids that it is OK to distress animals for fun. No doubt this is how Michael Vick got started.