August 21, 2008

Aspiring Light Bulb King Dethroned

Totalitarian State Illuminator
The old feeder is probably the worst businessman ever. Anyone would be better off taking investment advice or entrepreneurial guidance from a Magic Eight Ball than from me. Heck, I ought to start using one myself instead of trying to use my head.

I have successfully stored away enough cheap incandescent 40 Watt light bulbs to last me until I croak or the electrical grid collapses, whichever comes first. I'm not going to be a victim of the eco-totalitarian oppressors, or so I figured. When the law makes it illegal to sell incandescent light bulbs in 2012, I will not be forced into using cold, poisonous compact fluorescent light bulbs (CFLs).

I find that the best sources are big home improvement stores. Every time I visit one, I get a cart full of good, old-fashioned room warming incandescent light bulbs. Some places have already quit selling them, like Sam's Club, but Lowe's, Menard's and Home Depot stores around here still stock them. I get the cheapest ones available, one brand seems to last as long as another for me. I have acquired a scandalous number of them, raising only a few eyebrows from cashiers.

Sounds pretty smart, no? Maybe not.

Here's what is is going to happen. Congress is going to hear from more and more folks that don't like the idea of paying several dollars to replace a 25 cent light bulb. Some of these folks will find out just how nasty the light from these buzzing, grotesquely twisted fluorescent bulbs make their surrounding appear. Some will even find out that the mercury in them can actually get out and into your kids. These folks will pester their representatives in Washington to kill this nasty, anti freedom of choice, totalitarian law before its provisions even go into effect. There is already a bill in the House: H.R. 5616, the Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act.

Its a good thing I wasn't buying up bulbs with an eye toward cornering a future black market for outlaw light bulbs. I know at least one Nebraskan has set out to become the Outlaw Light Bulb King of Grand Island. One out in the third, whose comments you may have seen on many other blogs, said as much here in a comment. Nobody wants to end up like the cat that had warehouse full of hula-hoops when the fad died.

I can only hope that my room full of lightbulbs will serve as a hedge against inflation. With my luck in the realm of the coin, someone will find a way to make incandescent bulbs out of straw for less than a nickel apiece. Its what I deserve for betting against a good outcome.
Perhaps I may be able to take solace in the fact that if any would-be Light Bulb Kings get dethroned it will be the CFL profiteers, whose only interest in green is the dollar. Also, I'd like to see Al Gore pay the taxes and utility bills on his mansion with carbon credits in a world gone sane. Maybe if I wish real hard.
I found out about this legislation from World Net Daily: Lawmakers take up battle against light bulb ban. WND is off kilter on many things, but they got this right.
If the government can take away your choice on such matters as what kind of light bulbs you can use and you don't care, I have a suggestion for you. Call your representatives in Washington and ask them to draft and pass the Regulation of Everyday Life Bill as soon as possible. As Machiavelli advised the prince: bad news from the state is best delivered all at once, only good news should be drawn out. Gary Gilmore was more succinct: "Let's do it."

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