I'd Like 2 Eggs and a Side of Fast Bacon

I see the Russians are going hog wild with their new spectator sport of pig racing. I'm going to resist the urge to ridicule the Rooskies, and consider how hog races might benefit us largely unfit American chow hounds. We've come to the point, particularly here in northwest Iowa, where no one ever sees a live pig anymore. From the time they're born till the time they hit your plate they never see the light of day, much less get to enjoy pig pursuits like rooting around in dirt. It's all cement and antibiotics.

I'm not a commie or a swine rights advocate; this is an efficient way to assure that we get all the bacon we can eat. However, I'm thinking that what we're eating is a derivative of something that used to be a pig and, while I have no expectations, I'd like to see more people take an interest in eating the whole hog again, like our ancestors did. So...maybe if we got to watch lean hungry porkers racing each other and were eventually curious enough to compare them with the sedentary drugged out zombie pork that is helping keep us on the couch, then...well, maybe we'd start seeking out real hogs again.

I know, I know... free range pork is available to them that wants it. I just thought that by writing about Russian pig races and Austrian whorehouses I could get PTG to take over his blog again.