June 08, 2007

Paris Hilton: Too White For Jail?

Paris with her little dog
Paris Hilton, the gal that gives old money a bad name, has been naughty. Even those of us as make an effort to avoid being interested in the hotel heiress's peccadilloes are aware that she was finally sent off to do some time in the slammer. I don't even know what for, and don't care.

Naughty or not, Paris not only got her sentence mysteriously reduced, but now she's been sprung altogether. Now I can hear folks complaining that she is getting some sort of special treatment all the way out to the feedlot. Why the outrage? Isn't our criminal justice system inherently biased to favor the white man? What white man wants to see Paris suffer in a real jail? What will become of her little dog?
I was kidding about the 'race card'. Paris isn't too white for jail. She's just too rich. In our legal system, not only does money talk, it can also walk you right out of jail if you have enough. If this skank's name wasn't Hilton and she had been busted in Des Moines, she'd be just another Hoosegow Honey at iowahawk.
Update: Paris is dragged back to jail crying for her mother. Al Sharpton's race card evidently trumps whiteness when combined with idle richness.

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